You wonder what it would’ve been like if you'd made different
choices. If you followed different paths. If you
studied something completely
different. If you became an artist. Or a musician. If you made different
friends and went to different parties and met other interesting people. 
You wonder what it would’ve been like if you never broke off
the relationship based on incoherent ideas of a future with someone smarter or
richer who would make prettier babies. You wonder what would’ve happened if you
actually went on that coffee date. If you went to that party. If you kept that
weird friend. You wonder what it would’ve been like if you’d upped your
standards. If you left someone despite losing the comfort. If you got rid of
that subversive friend because you didn’t mind being alone. If you never took
the blame for something just to avoid an argument. And never subconsciously
started blaming yourself because you believed you did something wrong. If you stood
up for yourself despite the punches and scorn for not being like everyone else.
You wonder who you would've become if you were willing to
take the risk. If you decided to escape mediocrity. If you spent all your
savings to chase what you wanted. If you ran the extra mile. If you
sacrificed everything for that one thing that could change everything.
Because hell is when we look back during that fraction of a second and know that we wasted an opportunity to dignify the miracle of life. Even those who didn't do what they could've done... they had their punishment while they were alive by being unhappy...
